adressbar said: Hi Lazyyogi, I've done many people wrong in the past and have made amends to some and mentioned where I've been wrong exactly without expecting anything in return. But I feel like I need to do more. I'm wondering if you've ever experienced something similar. And your thoughts on how you would maybe make amends (?) Thank you.
Making up for your wrongs is an act of personal transformation. It is good to make amends when and where possible—I’m sure you can learn something from the twelve step program in that respect. But you feel like you need to do more because you haven’t gotten to the core of the obstacle.
You’ve done wrong and you feel bad or “off” as a result. You seek to digest and make peace with that feeling by making amends with these people. But if this is how you deal with these things then you will always compulsively have to make sure you’re 100% square with everyone.
Again, it’s always good to make amends. But do not wait until everything is copacetic externally before finding peace and forgiveness and love internally. That is how you free yourself from unnecessary suffering while still understanding that you should apologize and make amends.
What is more important than the wrong you have done in the past are the mind and perspectives that gave rise to those actions. Without addressing those, without seeing your own ignorance clearly and forgiving yourself, you will only act out the same confusion and delusion but under different circumstances. That is called the cycle of samsara.
Liberation from that cycle with respect to your current obstacle is by means of self-forgiveness. Learning to forgive yourself can also help you to learn how to forgive others. Give up the hope for a better past and use your pain and regret as a tool for insight, surrender, and transformation. The transmutation of shit into bliss is a useful and important spiritual practice in modern society.
Tonglen meditation will be very, very helpful.
Lastly, I strongly recommend the book The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron, which will help you to bring the light of conscious awareness into the most tender and painful parts of your being.
Namaste :) Much love.
NRA’s reaction to 9-year-old girl’s fatal Uzi shooting: Kids should ‘have fun at the shooting range’
Powerful US gun lobby, National Rifle Association, took the opportunity to present on social media ways children can “have fun at the shooting range” following the horrific accidental killing of a shooting instructor by a 9-year-old girl in Arizona.
Charles Vacca - a 39-year-old shooting instructor at a combined fast-food restaurant and firing range called Bullets and Burgers in White Hills, Arizona - was fatally shot in the head on Monday when a young girl he was directing lost control of an Uzi in “fully-automatic” mode. The 9-year old was on vacation from New Jersey with her family.
Jon Stewart Goes After Fox in Powerful Ferguson Monologue
I been waiting for the daily show to come back so they could cover this
LMAO, shouts out to Jon Stewart
Shoutout for Jon Stewart for not having me think white people are complete shit
When you come to see that you can do nothing, that the play of thought or feeling just goes on by itself as a happening, then you are in a state which we will call meditation. And slowly without being pushed, your thoughts will come to silence. That is to say, all the verbal symbolic chatter going on in the skull — don’t try and get rid of it because that will again produce the illusion that there’s a controller. It just goes on and goes on and goes on and finally gets tired of itself, gets bored and stops. And so then there’s a silence. And this is a deeper level of meditation. And in that silence you suddenly begin to see the world as it is.
Alan Watts (via unconditionedconsciousness)